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Photo Credit: scene-stealers

After witnessing the merciless ass-kicking the Germans bestowed upon the Aussies in the World Cup on Monday afternoon, my friends and I could not escape the mob of happily singing, Becks drinking, free Jaeger-shots distributing futbol-goers at our highly German-populated sports bar. We were basically held hostage at the bar until we drank our own body weight in booze.

Because of our lovely German buddies, yesterday we were reunited with an old friend, one we know very well—Señor Hangover. Our reunion with Señor Hangover inspired this post about the typical development of occurrences during our most of our encounters with Señor H, in chronological order of course.  It goes a lil’ something like this…

1. Wake up. Still drunk. Head is pounding. Room is spinning. The big question on the mind is “WTF happened last night?”

2. Check the Blackberry. Review outgoing calls, drunken BBMs/texts from last night. Too drunk to care.

3. Call last night’s partner in crime. Laugh as you piece the night together. Finally get the answer to “WTF happened last night?”. New questions arise. i.e. “We went where?”, “I did what?”, etc…

4. Hang up. Time to eat. Do more stupid shit like order $29 worth of tacos to feed hangover cravings. Laugh about the dumb shit you did. Still too drunk to care.

5. After eating enough food for a small village go back to sleep.

6. Wake up. No longer drunk.

7. Review outgoing calls, drunken BBMs/texts again–this time its no longer funny.

8. Call friend again. The events from last night suddenly went from hilarious to highly embarrassing.

9. Sit on couch. Go through several stages of self-loathing as you think “Why the fuck did I text that to my ex/boss/parents?” and “I hope none of last night’s pictures wind up online.” This couch session is usually accompanied by laptop open to Ex’s latest uploaded Facebook album of pics with their new boyfriend/girlfriend.

10. Emotions of self-loathing strengthen. Yell things like “My life’s a joke”, “I’m pathetic”, “No wonder I’m single”, “I need some control in my life.”

11. Couch recovery session continues while watching re-runs of Judge Mathis and People’s Court. Bag of Doritos in hand.

12. Nap again.

13. Shower.

14. Check phone. Read text message that says “Happy Hour at 6? $3 Martinis.”

15. Smile and think “Fuck it.” Reply “See you there!”. Get ready to do it all over again!

For a true LiverBasher, dealing with a hangover just comes with the territory, but it doesn’t keep us from liver bashing on!

Congrats Germany and thanks for the free booze.

Co-authored by LiverBashing Lola’s partner in crime JQ2.

Saturday June 19th, 2010 3:30pm – 8:00pm on Governers island
Click here for more info and ticket purchase

Photos to come after the event